"Daft to Build a Castle on a Swamp"

From the King of the Swamp, Monte Python and the Holy Grail:

"When I first came here, this was all swamp. Everyone said I was daft to build a castle on a swamp, but I built in all the same, just to show them. It sank into the swamp.

"So I built a second one. That sank into the swamp.

"So I built a third. That burned down, fell over, then sank into the swamp.

"But the fourth one stayed up. And that's what you're going to get, Lad, the strongest castle in all of England."

Well, my daft reader, keep on building.  It took me from 1996 until 2007 to get the right combination of habits, information, support, and old habits (finally) kicked to eat in the way that makes me feel my best.

First, take a 30 day challenge of nothing but meat, vegetables, nuts and seeds, little fruit or starch.  Eat all you want of the meat and veggies, eggs and bacon, sour cream, hard cheeses, coconut oil, butter, MCT oil, avocado (with salt and either champagne vinegar, red wine vinegar, or apple cider vinegar, as you prefer), sunflower seeds and macadamia nuts.  Take magnesium, salt, and potassium liberally, sip water continuously.  What you'll notice is that even though there's no conscious restriction of intake, and that you have a green light to eat whenever hungry, you'll eat less than your prior approach.  After you get through the pain of putting a foundation in the swamp (teaching your body to use fat for fuel most of the time), you will feel incredible!  You'll think that building castles in the swamp is the best idea ever. 

After the 30 days, make your best effort to sustain your wheat and sugar free life; zero is good, but many people do well by limiting these foods to one day per week.  So can slam down all you want of the nasty food on Sunday, but no other day, for example.  If this keeps you off of the junk Mon-Sat, it's a good trade.

Booze - try the same approach as above.  Use vodka, gin, or tequila at first.  The famed NORCAL margarita:  shot of vodka, gin or tequila, an entire lemon or lime, and carbonated water to taste.

After you get this up and running, your castle will sink into the swamp.  It will happen slowly, but surely, and you'll notice one day that your "I'm doing great, I can eat this bite of cake" has turned into "I'm doing great, I'll eat another whole cake for lunch.  That breakfast cake was great."  Or the "Yay, beer and shitty carb foods on Saturday!" becomes "Hey, I only drink a half case of Sam Adams six days a week, why am I bloated and dehydrated all the time? Why can't I fit into my new clothes I had to buy?"  Well, the reason is your paleo lifestyle castle sank into the swamp, my friend.

And when you feel bad enough, mentally and physically, and you can no longer see your toes, or tie your shoes without groaning about how damned hard it is to reach the laces with that huge belly in the way, you'll start to rebuild your swamp castle, even though everyone will say you're daft, there's no use trying.  But you'll do it anyway, just to show 'em.  And that one will sink into the swamp too.

When I was in Iraq in 2006, and hit 225 pounds (PR!) with a girth of 39 inches around my belly, I knew my castle had burned down, fell over and was sinking into the swamp.  So I built the fourth one, and after 11 years, that 2007 swamp has lasted.  You can have one too. 

PS: you don't have to make it this hard. If you build just one castle on dry land and it's good from the start and your castle never falls over, that's fine too.